THE HEART OF ADDICTION
CHAPTER 4
Who are You?
Having met and counseled over a thousand addicts during the past fifteen years, there are many observations I want to share with you that I pray will be beneficial to your process of transformation. Some of these ideas are biblically-derived from Scripture but not biblically-directed. Biblically-directed principles are clear statements from Scripture such as “thou shalt not murder.” Biblically-derived principles are not clearly stated but can clearly be implied from the Bible as a whole. Some of the observations and metaphors in this unit are not biblically based at all. When that is the case, I will endeavor to make that clear to you. God Ponders the Heart Examine your own heart in this matter of substance abuse and addiction. Understand that only God really knows what resides in the heart of any man. You and I do not know what is in another person’s heart, and sometimes we don’t realize what is in our own hearts; therefore, we can deceive ourselves.28 Secular modalities believe that man is inherently good and that truth comes from within each person’s heart. This is a lie. According to the Bible, mankind is born in sin. The sinful nature of mankind desires to please self; therefore, at times, man cannot examine his own heart without the help of God’s Word and another person because most of the things he does are selfish and self-serving. Man is blind and needs the truth of God found outside the heart of man – in the pages of the Bible – in order to illuminate his heart and motives. Man needs to put God’s truth within his heart by studying, memorizing, and meditating upon the Holy Scriptures. To examine the motives and desires of his heart, the addict must believe the truth found in Hebrews 4:12-13: For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. And no creature is hidden from his sight but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account. The Being to whom we must give account is God alone according to Hebrews 4:13. God knows every creature’s heart since He is the Creator and is all-knowing. God is merciful to us by giving us His Word that is alive, active, and able to discern the thoughts, intentions, and motives of our heart. For this reason, we must let God’s Word guide us in any self-examination. God’s Word is the standard by which we are to measure the motives of the heart. Creation, the Fall, and Redemption The best understanding of addiction is derived from a biblical framework. Let’s start at the book of beginnings – Genesis. A perfect world was created by God in the beginning, and man did not have a sinful nature and a sinful heart. Mankind was holy and righteous but created with the capacity to make a willful choice to disobey God. Genesis chapters 1 and 2 give you a glimpse of the beauty of God’s creation, but what happened in Genesis 3 changed the world forever. In Genesis 3, all of mankind represented by the perfect man named Adam willfully chose to disobey God. This is known as “The Fall.” As a result of the disobedient choice Adam made, every person is now born with a sinful nature and sinful heart. In other words, mankind is born with a self-centered nature that wills to think, speak, and act selfishly and independently from God. For example, no one has to teach a one year old baby to cry and throw a temper tantrum when he does not get what he wants! Selfishness does not have to be taught to children! They automatically respond in a self-centered manner driven by their sinful nature and sinful heart. Do you believe you were born with a fallen, sinful nature and sinful heart? Genesis 5:1-3 states: …When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God. Male and female he created them, and he blessed them and named them Man when they were created. When Adam had lived 130 years, he fathered a son in his own likeness, after his image, and named him Seth (Emphasis mine). Genesis 5:3 says that Adam’s son, Seth, is born in Adam’s image which is now corrupted by sin: defiled, frail, miserable, and mortal. Seth and everyone born after him are now born in the image and likeness of sinful Adam with a marred and fallen nature. Sinners produce more sinners. Human beings are still like God in many respects but they are unlike God in that they have a natural desire toward evil. It is a strange mixture indeed. God does not know evil experientially. You and I are born into this selfish state of wanting to be independent of God. In essence, we say, “God, You do your thing and let me do mine. I don’t need you. I can do better on my own.” We think we know better than God! Most people do not see the “bigness” of sin. They underestimate sin’s power. Sin is a big and powerful foe that resides in your heart! Your sinful nature is much more powerful than you realize. Even if you have the Holy Spirit living within you, you have the “old man”29 full of self-serving, sinful thoughts and habits that you will contend with for the remainder of your life. By God’s power and grace, you will gradually learn how to overcome your old nature (or “old man”), but it is a lifelong process called sanctification. God is a redeeming Person who desires to give back to you what was lost, but you are responsible for giving your best effort during this battle. It is called a “battle” and “spiritual warfare” in the Bible because you will struggle. Regardless of how we have served or failed to serve God, He deals with sinful man in a loving, merciful, patient, and gracious manner. From Genesis 3 to the end of the Bible, God reveals His Plan of Redemption to us: God sends a new “Adam,” His only begotten Son, Jesus, in the form of a man. Jesus represented mankind in paying the penalty for sin with His death on the cross just as Adam represented mankind in committing sin.30 Because of God’s justice, He could not allow sin to go unpunished; therefore, someone had to pay the penalty of sin by the shedding of blood and the loss of life. That Person is Jesus and because He died, sinners were “redeemed,” which means “bought back” from the penalty, position, and practice of their sinful ways.31 God purchased you if you are trusting in Jesus. In fact, God not only owns you, but He adopted you into His family and is your Heavenly Father. Do not underestimate and miss the significance of what God did. God not only redeems and adopts His people, but God empowers His people by giving them a measure of the Holy Spirit to dwell within them and to battle the sin nature. II Corinthians 5:16-17 states: “From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” Born again Christians have a new, Spirit-filled nature that indwells their sinful bodies of flesh.32 They must contend with their “old self”33 and the habits of the flesh for the rest of their lives until they receive new, glorified bodies in everlasting life. The indwelling of the Holy Spirit gives Christians the ability and power to say “no” to sin habits. The Holy Spirit enables a Christian to change, repent, and overcome addiction. No longer do you have to say you are “powerless” to battle addictions because you are empowered by your Sovereign, Almighty Creator and Lord. It is God’s power and not your own power that can conquer any addiction. In time, you will think, speak, and act like a new creation in Christ Jesus and the difference will be evident to everyone you know. The Importance of the Word of God As a result of the Fall of mankind in Genesis 3, you now have a capacity for addiction in your flesh; however, you must take responsibility for your actions, walk according to the leading of the Holy Spirit, and learn how to think, speak, and act according to God’s Word. How do we get a proper understanding of God’s commandments? God alone gives wisdom and understanding.34 Ask Him to give you insight and understanding about your problem of addiction. James 1:5-6 states: “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting…” Your understanding will increase as you learn His commandments in the Bible. God will open your eyes so you can learn to relate properly to Him. God has created His people to have a relationship with Him and He reveals His character to His people through His Word of Truth. Throughout the Bible, God communicates to us who we are, how much He loves us, how He made us, what He wants us to do with our life, and where we are going to be in our final destination! With all of this essential information contained in the Bible, isn’t it amazing how often Christians neglect reading, studying, memorizing, and meditating upon the Word of God? God does not want you to be ignorant.35 God’s Word is an essential resource for the Christian.36 Satan knows it is true, too, and that is why he will interfere greatly when people plan to read and study their Bibles in their quiet times devoted to God. Satan does not want you to know how good God really is! In counseling, I often ask people: “What have you done about your problem?” The usual response is that the counselee has prayed, talked to friends, talked to family, and attended some fellowship groups. Rarely does a counselee respond by saying: “I have really been digging into my Bible to find the answer to my problem. I read and study it so much that I forget to eat sometimes!” If you have not yet turned to the Bible for answers, how can you experience the transforming power of God’s Word applied to your life? Are you reading this book in order to find the answer to your problem of substance abuse and addiction? If you are born again and still addicted to something, then you must become “addicted to Jesus.” You have a worship disorder that makes you prone to worship (or serve) yourself rather than to worship and serve the Lord your Creator. Put on the Lord Jesus Christ! You must switch your addiction from something that temporarily pleases you into something that eternally pleases God and therefore pleases you! Put God first and everything else will take care of itself.37 When I say that you must “get addicted to learning about Jesus,” I simply mean that you must re-focus your heart’s desires upon cultivating a relationship with Jesus. Your heart must learn to desire to know Jesus more intimately than it wants any temporary pleasure. Now you know that God desires to reveal His awesome character to you! It is your responsibility to seek after Him, and He will reveal Himself to you. Turn to God now by reading His Words to you. Believers and Unbelievers The Bible categorizes people into two important and different groups: believers in Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and non-believers. It is really that simple according to the Bible. It is important for you to determine whether or not you are trusting in the Lord Jesus Christ for your eternal life. In other words, are you a Christian? Are you a believer? Ask yourself: Am I a Christian who is physically addicted and enslaved to a mood-altering pleasure? Or am I what the Bible calls an “unbeliever” because I am trusting in my good deeds to outnumber my bad deeds to get me into heaven rather than Christ? Biblically speaking, you have to be in one of these two categories. Satan tries to convince sinners that they are saints.38 Satan wants unrepentant sinners (unbelievers) to think they are naturally good and do not need a Savior. Our sinful flesh willingly participates in this lie because we don’t want to believe we possess a single undesirable quality. If the enemy can convince us to buy this secular lie, we will not believe the Gospel message of Christianity. The gospel message is foolishness to those who wrongly think they are saints. I Corinthians 1:18 states: “For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” The truth is that “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”39 so everyone is in need of a Savior when compared to a perfectly holy God. If you are an unbeliever, I urge you to go to Appendix B and read it immediately. The unbeliever does not have the resources to make lasting changes in regard to addiction. The unbeliever does not have: •a Savior to trust •the indwelling Holy Spirit to empower him •a loving relationship with God the Father •an ability to properly understand the biblical principles in the Word of God •probably does not have a membership in a Bible-teaching church. Guilt: A Call to Repentance The continued struggle with sin in this area causes more guilt in a believer than an unbeliever who is doing the same things! One of the Holy Spirit’s functions is to convict people of sin.40 For a believer who has the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, this lifestyle of continual sin and disobedience is a constantly painful state of being. You must repent of (turn from) your sin and become obedient to Christ in your thoughts and actions. If you are a Christian who is living to please only yourself, then you are also acting as your own god, which is the sin of idolatry in the Bible (I Corinthians 10:1-14). You are created to serve God. Submit to God by confessing and then repenting of your selfish thoughts, words, and deeds of addiction. When you have a sense of guilt over your behavior it is a sign that God is speaking to you through the Holy Spirit. You can only do this with the help of the Holy Spirit. Apply the principles and practical wisdom in the following pages of this book. Mistaken Identity? A third category of persons in the church of the Lord Jesus Christ are thosse who are confused and deceived. They believe they are Christians when they are not truly born again. These persons mistakenly think they are Christians because they possess knowledge, but their hearts have truly not yet been changed by God. They are basing their heart change on some faulty, unbiblical assumptions.41 Jesus taught the parable of wheat and tares (weeds) in Matthew 13:24-30 and then explained its meaning in Matthew 13:36-43. Wheat and weeds grow together in the visible church according to the parable in Matthew 13:24-30. In other words, in the visible and local church body, there are those who are truly born again – called the “wheat” – and those who are not born again and yet belong to the church – called the “weeds.”42 Open and read this passage of Scripture in your Bible now. The parable is found in Matthew 13:24-30 and the meaning of the parable explained by Jesus is found in Matthew 13:36-43. Sincerely Deceived Those who are not truly “born again” of the Holy Spirit may still experience the benefits and blessings of being around true believers. This third category of persons who are not truly saved may be the toughest category to counsel because of the deception—they think they will ultimately be in heaven. They are sincere, but they are sincerely deceived. The Apostle Paul called them “false brothers” in II Corinthians 11:26b and nearly every church has members who are false brothers and sisters. Desperately Sick Jeremiah 17:9-10 warns that you cannot understand your own heart if you are an unbeliever: “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? I the Lord search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds.” Self-deception is a major element of addiction and will be addressed in more detail in later chapters. For now, understand that self-evaluations are not entirely accurate because of a selfish bias. A trusted Christian friend may be needed to help you gain an accurate picture of your weaknesses because everyone has blind spots. Again, we are all created to be dependent creatures so we need God, and God has given us other people to help us as well. Do You Know the Lord Jesus Christ? Are you Born Again? Even though self-evaluations can often be imperfect, begin to examine your own heart and your behaviors right now to determine if you need the saving grace of the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus plainly states to Nicodemus in John 3:3-8: Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” Nicodemus said to him, “How can a man be born when he is old? Can he enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born?” Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not marvel that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear its sound, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.” Salvation is of the Lord, meaning that eternal life is a gift from God and the Holy Spirit is the agent who stirs and works in your spirit and causes you to trust in Jesus Christ.43 If you have any uncertainty about your eternal destination, I strongly encourage you to ask for someone to help you to understand the gospel message of grace now. Honestly answer the following question: “If I asked ten of the people who know you the best, would those people say that you are a godly, Christian person or that you are a selfish person, a drunkard, or an idolater?” List those ten people on a sheet of paper and write your answer beside each name.44 If you are not sure what each person would say, call them and ask them to tell you the truth without holding back. Since they might not want to answer you honestly, you may need to have a spouse or close, trusted Christian friend call the ten people. You must be serious about this issue because God is serious about it. Galatians 5:19-21 states: Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. Do not think that any practicing drunkards will inherit the kingdom of God. Remember that you are only deceiving yourself—not God—if you continue to pretend to be a Christian. God says the same thing in I Corinthians 6:9-10: Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. God is serious about sin and the sin of drunkenness in particular. Intimate Fellowship God is serious about requiring us to have a relationship with Him. In Matthew 7:21-23, Jesus states: Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’ Do not take your relationship with the Lord for granted, but be diligent in your pursuit of intimate fellowship and knowledge of Him. You are robbing yourself if you do not get to know your Creator more intimately! Life-Dominated Abusers vs. Occasional Abusers After you identify by the Lord’s grace whether you are an unbeliever or a believer who is enslaved to an addiction, the next issue is to determine the extent to which the addiction problem has infected and dominated your life. When a sin begins to dominate your life the Bible gives you a label. You actually begin to be personified by the sin that so dominates you. Some examples of this are liar, thief, adulterer, glutton, rebel, fool, proud person, drunkard, sluggard, lover of money, lover of pleasure, and idolater. To be identified and personified as one of these is a serious problem. A drunkard is a person whose life is so dominated by the sin of drunkenness that he is properly labeled as a “drunkard.” If you are an occasional excessive abuser of a desired intoxicant, you could be labeled as a “sinner” or an “idolater” according to biblical standards. Whether you are a drunkard or an occasional excessive user of a drug, there is still a sin problem in your heart. The world refers to these two groups of drunkards and addicts as “chemically dependent” or “chemically abusive.” Both groups of people are manifesting a heart problem of idolatry and drunkenness. The only difference is that one group is at an earlier stage of physical control. Remember that people usually only look at the result of a drunkard’s life when it is spiraling out of control. Therefore, those people think thoughts like: •“That could never happen to me” •“Boy, that drunkard really can’t control himself but I can” •“I’ll never end up like her.” The drunkard had those same thoughts earlier in life, too! The thoughts of escape and behaviors of avoidance seem innocent and harmless in the beginning. Then an addict (drunkard) becomes trapped and wonders: “How did I get this way?” The drunkard is losing control of nearly everything due to the invasion of the problem into every area of his life. Drunkenness manifests itself in marital, economic, social, physical, emotional, familial, occupational, and spiritual problems. Whether you are a believer or an unbeliever, a life-dominated abuser or an occasional abuser, you are in need of a radical heart change. You can do it with God’s power so you must not try it alone. You need other people, you need the Holy Sprit’s power, you need Jesus to forgive you and sustain you. Call upon the Lord who hears you! “In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I called. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry came to his ears.45
Prayer of Heart Change and Application:
Dear Heavenly Father, as you look into my heart, tell me what it is about myself that I must know in order to overcome this addiction. Thank you for saving me by grace through faith in you. You alone are worthy of praise as you have taken this hard-hearted person and are beginning to transform me by your truth. Reveal to me the extent of my addictive problem so that I may [begin] [continue] the transformation process knowing that you are guiding me every step of the way. Amen.
Having met and counseled over a thousand addicts during the past fifteen years, there are many observations I want to share with you that I pray will be beneficial to your process of transformation. Some of these ideas are biblically-derived from Scripture but not biblically-directed. Biblically-directed principles are clear statements from Scripture such as “thou shalt not murder.” Biblically-derived principles are not clearly stated but can clearly be implied from the Bible as a whole. Some of the observations and metaphors in this unit are not biblically based at all. When that is the case, I will endeavor to make that clear to you. God Ponders the Heart Examine your own heart in this matter of substance abuse and addiction. Understand that only God really knows what resides in the heart of any man. You and I do not know what is in another person’s heart, and sometimes we don’t realize what is in our own hearts; therefore, we can deceive ourselves.28 Secular modalities believe that man is inherently good and that truth comes from within each person’s heart. This is a lie. According to the Bible, mankind is born in sin. The sinful nature of mankind desires to please self; therefore, at times, man cannot examine his own heart without the help of God’s Word and another person because most of the things he does are selfish and self-serving. Man is blind and needs the truth of God found outside the heart of man – in the pages of the Bible – in order to illuminate his heart and motives. Man needs to put God’s truth within his heart by studying, memorizing, and meditating upon the Holy Scriptures. To examine the motives and desires of his heart, the addict must believe the truth found in Hebrews 4:12-13: For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. And no creature is hidden from his sight but all are naked and exposed to the eyes of him to whom we must give account. The Being to whom we must give account is God alone according to Hebrews 4:13. God knows every creature’s heart since He is the Creator and is all-knowing. God is merciful to us by giving us His Word that is alive, active, and able to discern the thoughts, intentions, and motives of our heart. For this reason, we must let God’s Word guide us in any self-examination. God’s Word is the standard by which we are to measure the motives of the heart. Creation, the Fall, and Redemption The best understanding of addiction is derived from a biblical framework. Let’s start at the book of beginnings – Genesis. A perfect world was created by God in the beginning, and man did not have a sinful nature and a sinful heart. Mankind was holy and righteous but created with the capacity to make a willful choice to disobey God. Genesis chapters 1 and 2 give you a glimpse of the beauty of God’s creation, but what happened in Genesis 3 changed the world forever. In Genesis 3, all of mankind represented by the perfect man named Adam willfully chose to disobey God. This is known as “The Fall.” As a result of the disobedient choice Adam made, every person is now born with a sinful nature and sinful heart. In other words, mankind is born with a self-centered nature that wills to think, speak, and act selfishly and independently from God. For example, no one has to teach a one year old baby to cry and throw a temper tantrum when he does not get what he wants! Selfishness does not have to be taught to children! They automatically respond in a self-centered manner driven by their sinful nature and sinful heart. Do you believe you were born with a fallen, sinful nature and sinful heart? Genesis 5:1-3 states: …When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God. Male and female he created them, and he blessed them and named them Man when they were created. When Adam had lived 130 years, he fathered a son in his own likeness, after his image, and named him Seth (Emphasis mine). Genesis 5:3 says that Adam’s son, Seth, is born in Adam’s image which is now corrupted by sin: defiled, frail, miserable, and mortal. Seth and everyone born after him are now born in the image and likeness of sinful Adam with a marred and fallen nature. Sinners produce more sinners. Human beings are still like God in many respects but they are unlike God in that they have a natural desire toward evil. It is a strange mixture indeed. God does not know evil experientially. You and I are born into this selfish state of wanting to be independent of God. In essence, we say, “God, You do your thing and let me do mine. I don’t need you. I can do better on my own.” We think we know better than God! Most people do not see the “bigness” of sin. They underestimate sin’s power. Sin is a big and powerful foe that resides in your heart! Your sinful nature is much more powerful than you realize. Even if you have the Holy Spirit living within you, you have the “old man”29 full of self-serving, sinful thoughts and habits that you will contend with for the remainder of your life. By God’s power and grace, you will gradually learn how to overcome your old nature (or “old man”), but it is a lifelong process called sanctification. God is a redeeming Person who desires to give back to you what was lost, but you are responsible for giving your best effort during this battle. It is called a “battle” and “spiritual warfare” in the Bible because you will struggle. Regardless of how we have served or failed to serve God, He deals with sinful man in a loving, merciful, patient, and gracious manner. From Genesis 3 to the end of the Bible, God reveals His Plan of Redemption to us: God sends a new “Adam,” His only begotten Son, Jesus, in the form of a man. Jesus represented mankind in paying the penalty for sin with His death on the cross just as Adam represented mankind in committing sin.30 Because of God’s justice, He could not allow sin to go unpunished; therefore, someone had to pay the penalty of sin by the shedding of blood and the loss of life. That Person is Jesus and because He died, sinners were “redeemed,” which means “bought back” from the penalty, position, and practice of their sinful ways.31 God purchased you if you are trusting in Jesus. In fact, God not only owns you, but He adopted you into His family and is your Heavenly Father. Do not underestimate and miss the significance of what God did. God not only redeems and adopts His people, but God empowers His people by giving them a measure of the Holy Spirit to dwell within them and to battle the sin nature. II Corinthians 5:16-17 states: “From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” Born again Christians have a new, Spirit-filled nature that indwells their sinful bodies of flesh.32 They must contend with their “old self”33 and the habits of the flesh for the rest of their lives until they receive new, glorified bodies in everlasting life. The indwelling of the Holy Spirit gives Christians the ability and power to say “no” to sin habits. The Holy Spirit enables a Christian to change, repent, and overcome addiction. No longer do you have to say you are “powerless” to battle addictions because you are empowered by your Sovereign, Almighty Creator and Lord. It is God’s power and not your own power that can conquer any addiction. In time, you will think, speak, and act like a new creation in Christ Jesus and the difference will be evident to everyone you know. The Importance of the Word of God As a result of the Fall of mankind in Genesis 3, you now have a capacity for addiction in your flesh; however, you must take responsibility for your actions, walk according to the leading of the Holy Spirit, and learn how to think, speak, and act according to God’s Word. How do we get a proper understanding of God’s commandments? God alone gives wisdom and understanding.34 Ask Him to give you insight and understanding about your problem of addiction. James 1:5-6 states: “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting…” Your understanding will increase as you learn His commandments in the Bible. God will open your eyes so you can learn to relate properly to Him. God has created His people to have a relationship with Him and He reveals His character to His people through His Word of Truth. Throughout the Bible, God communicates to us who we are, how much He loves us, how He made us, what He wants us to do with our life, and where we are going to be in our final destination! With all of this essential information contained in the Bible, isn’t it amazing how often Christians neglect reading, studying, memorizing, and meditating upon the Word of God? God does not want you to be ignorant.35 God’s Word is an essential resource for the Christian.36 Satan knows it is true, too, and that is why he will interfere greatly when people plan to read and study their Bibles in their quiet times devoted to God. Satan does not want you to know how good God really is! In counseling, I often ask people: “What have you done about your problem?” The usual response is that the counselee has prayed, talked to friends, talked to family, and attended some fellowship groups. Rarely does a counselee respond by saying: “I have really been digging into my Bible to find the answer to my problem. I read and study it so much that I forget to eat sometimes!” If you have not yet turned to the Bible for answers, how can you experience the transforming power of God’s Word applied to your life? Are you reading this book in order to find the answer to your problem of substance abuse and addiction? If you are born again and still addicted to something, then you must become “addicted to Jesus.” You have a worship disorder that makes you prone to worship (or serve) yourself rather than to worship and serve the Lord your Creator. Put on the Lord Jesus Christ! You must switch your addiction from something that temporarily pleases you into something that eternally pleases God and therefore pleases you! Put God first and everything else will take care of itself.37 When I say that you must “get addicted to learning about Jesus,” I simply mean that you must re-focus your heart’s desires upon cultivating a relationship with Jesus. Your heart must learn to desire to know Jesus more intimately than it wants any temporary pleasure. Now you know that God desires to reveal His awesome character to you! It is your responsibility to seek after Him, and He will reveal Himself to you. Turn to God now by reading His Words to you. Believers and Unbelievers The Bible categorizes people into two important and different groups: believers in Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and non-believers. It is really that simple according to the Bible. It is important for you to determine whether or not you are trusting in the Lord Jesus Christ for your eternal life. In other words, are you a Christian? Are you a believer? Ask yourself: Am I a Christian who is physically addicted and enslaved to a mood-altering pleasure? Or am I what the Bible calls an “unbeliever” because I am trusting in my good deeds to outnumber my bad deeds to get me into heaven rather than Christ? Biblically speaking, you have to be in one of these two categories. Satan tries to convince sinners that they are saints.38 Satan wants unrepentant sinners (unbelievers) to think they are naturally good and do not need a Savior. Our sinful flesh willingly participates in this lie because we don’t want to believe we possess a single undesirable quality. If the enemy can convince us to buy this secular lie, we will not believe the Gospel message of Christianity. The gospel message is foolishness to those who wrongly think they are saints. I Corinthians 1:18 states: “For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” The truth is that “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God”39 so everyone is in need of a Savior when compared to a perfectly holy God. If you are an unbeliever, I urge you to go to Appendix B and read it immediately. The unbeliever does not have the resources to make lasting changes in regard to addiction. The unbeliever does not have: •a Savior to trust •the indwelling Holy Spirit to empower him •a loving relationship with God the Father •an ability to properly understand the biblical principles in the Word of God •probably does not have a membership in a Bible-teaching church. Guilt: A Call to Repentance The continued struggle with sin in this area causes more guilt in a believer than an unbeliever who is doing the same things! One of the Holy Spirit’s functions is to convict people of sin.40 For a believer who has the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, this lifestyle of continual sin and disobedience is a constantly painful state of being. You must repent of (turn from) your sin and become obedient to Christ in your thoughts and actions. If you are a Christian who is living to please only yourself, then you are also acting as your own god, which is the sin of idolatry in the Bible (I Corinthians 10:1-14). You are created to serve God. Submit to God by confessing and then repenting of your selfish thoughts, words, and deeds of addiction. When you have a sense of guilt over your behavior it is a sign that God is speaking to you through the Holy Spirit. You can only do this with the help of the Holy Spirit. Apply the principles and practical wisdom in the following pages of this book. Mistaken Identity? A third category of persons in the church of the Lord Jesus Christ are thosse who are confused and deceived. They believe they are Christians when they are not truly born again. These persons mistakenly think they are Christians because they possess knowledge, but their hearts have truly not yet been changed by God. They are basing their heart change on some faulty, unbiblical assumptions.41 Jesus taught the parable of wheat and tares (weeds) in Matthew 13:24-30 and then explained its meaning in Matthew 13:36-43. Wheat and weeds grow together in the visible church according to the parable in Matthew 13:24-30. In other words, in the visible and local church body, there are those who are truly born again – called the “wheat” – and those who are not born again and yet belong to the church – called the “weeds.”42 Open and read this passage of Scripture in your Bible now. The parable is found in Matthew 13:24-30 and the meaning of the parable explained by Jesus is found in Matthew 13:36-43. Sincerely Deceived Those who are not truly “born again” of the Holy Spirit may still experience the benefits and blessings of being around true believers. This third category of persons who are not truly saved may be the toughest category to counsel because of the deception—they think they will ultimately be in heaven. They are sincere, but they are sincerely deceived. The Apostle Paul called them “false brothers” in II Corinthians 11:26b and nearly every church has members who are false brothers and sisters. Desperately Sick Jeremiah 17:9-10 warns that you cannot understand your own heart if you are an unbeliever: “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? I the Lord search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds.” Self-deception is a major element of addiction and will be addressed in more detail in later chapters. For now, understand that self-evaluations are not entirely accurate because of a selfish bias. A trusted Christian friend may be needed to help you gain an accurate picture of your weaknesses because everyone has blind spots. Again, we are all created to be dependent creatures so we need God, and God has given us other people to help us as well. Do You Know the Lord Jesus Christ? Are you Born Again? Even though self-evaluations can often be imperfect, begin to examine your own heart and your behaviors right now to determine if you need the saving grace of the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus plainly states to Nicodemus in John 3:3-8: Jesus answered him, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.” Nicodemus said to him, “How can a man be born when he is old? Can he enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be born?” Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not marvel that I said to you, ‘You must be born again.’ The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear its sound, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.” Salvation is of the Lord, meaning that eternal life is a gift from God and the Holy Spirit is the agent who stirs and works in your spirit and causes you to trust in Jesus Christ.43 If you have any uncertainty about your eternal destination, I strongly encourage you to ask for someone to help you to understand the gospel message of grace now. Honestly answer the following question: “If I asked ten of the people who know you the best, would those people say that you are a godly, Christian person or that you are a selfish person, a drunkard, or an idolater?” List those ten people on a sheet of paper and write your answer beside each name.44 If you are not sure what each person would say, call them and ask them to tell you the truth without holding back. Since they might not want to answer you honestly, you may need to have a spouse or close, trusted Christian friend call the ten people. You must be serious about this issue because God is serious about it. Galatians 5:19-21 states: Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. Do not think that any practicing drunkards will inherit the kingdom of God. Remember that you are only deceiving yourself—not God—if you continue to pretend to be a Christian. God says the same thing in I Corinthians 6:9-10: Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. God is serious about sin and the sin of drunkenness in particular. Intimate Fellowship God is serious about requiring us to have a relationship with Him. In Matthew 7:21-23, Jesus states: Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’ Do not take your relationship with the Lord for granted, but be diligent in your pursuit of intimate fellowship and knowledge of Him. You are robbing yourself if you do not get to know your Creator more intimately! Life-Dominated Abusers vs. Occasional Abusers After you identify by the Lord’s grace whether you are an unbeliever or a believer who is enslaved to an addiction, the next issue is to determine the extent to which the addiction problem has infected and dominated your life. When a sin begins to dominate your life the Bible gives you a label. You actually begin to be personified by the sin that so dominates you. Some examples of this are liar, thief, adulterer, glutton, rebel, fool, proud person, drunkard, sluggard, lover of money, lover of pleasure, and idolater. To be identified and personified as one of these is a serious problem. A drunkard is a person whose life is so dominated by the sin of drunkenness that he is properly labeled as a “drunkard.” If you are an occasional excessive abuser of a desired intoxicant, you could be labeled as a “sinner” or an “idolater” according to biblical standards. Whether you are a drunkard or an occasional excessive user of a drug, there is still a sin problem in your heart. The world refers to these two groups of drunkards and addicts as “chemically dependent” or “chemically abusive.” Both groups of people are manifesting a heart problem of idolatry and drunkenness. The only difference is that one group is at an earlier stage of physical control. Remember that people usually only look at the result of a drunkard’s life when it is spiraling out of control. Therefore, those people think thoughts like: •“That could never happen to me” •“Boy, that drunkard really can’t control himself but I can” •“I’ll never end up like her.” The drunkard had those same thoughts earlier in life, too! The thoughts of escape and behaviors of avoidance seem innocent and harmless in the beginning. Then an addict (drunkard) becomes trapped and wonders: “How did I get this way?” The drunkard is losing control of nearly everything due to the invasion of the problem into every area of his life. Drunkenness manifests itself in marital, economic, social, physical, emotional, familial, occupational, and spiritual problems. Whether you are a believer or an unbeliever, a life-dominated abuser or an occasional abuser, you are in need of a radical heart change. You can do it with God’s power so you must not try it alone. You need other people, you need the Holy Sprit’s power, you need Jesus to forgive you and sustain you. Call upon the Lord who hears you! “In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I called. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry came to his ears.45
Prayer of Heart Change and Application:
Dear Heavenly Father, as you look into my heart, tell me what it is about myself that I must know in order to overcome this addiction. Thank you for saving me by grace through faith in you. You alone are worthy of praise as you have taken this hard-hearted person and are beginning to transform me by your truth. Reveal to me the extent of my addictive problem so that I may [begin] [continue] the transformation process knowing that you are guiding me every step of the way. Amen.